Last few days

Friday, January 7, 2010
1:34pm

I am being so exceptionally lazy today. I am still in my pajamas, John's robe over top, drinking chai. But I gotta soak it up now, because in just two days, my semester starts again with a Sunday night meeting of the Spanish TA's.

Wed. I didn't write because I didn't do much. I cleaned house for about five hours, cooked for two, and did TaeBo. Anyway, the trailer's clean now. Very, very clean.

Yesterday I started off reading one of the essays for the culture class I have next semester. The reading isn't due finished until January 24, but I figured I'd get a head start because for one thing, I should read everything twice being in Spanish, and, also, I can only sit still with nothing to do over break for so long. Right now, I'm very much at my own, relaxed pace. Hopefully, by reading ahead, I can maintain that moreso throughout the semester. I would really love to still be cooking, playing piano, my drum, drawing, and sipping chai in pajamas once the semester starts rolling.

In a way, I am glad for the new semester. As I've said several times, last semester was just rough. So much to deal with in such a compressed time frame. Going in this time, I am less nervous. I know the department, the expected standards. I am more interested in the course material this time around, too. I am going to have to get used to a new text book really quickly, but at least I now trust myself in front of an academic classroom. I can teach Spanish. I was nervous the first time, maybe more than I realized, not shy, but just untrusting in my ability to really do it well. So going in this time, I'm fine with it. Things are also a lot less cluttered in other areas of my life. I've been doing a lot of mental clearing out, which has helped with things internally, but also, things have calmed down a lot externally. I hope it continues in just such a way, but even if the external changes, I think I've gotten back in touch enough with myself that I can still maintain a moderate internal climate.

John and I went down to Brew Pub last night, met Tiffany and Jim, a couple other people in the geology department. I had my first PBR in a few years and a couple Red Stripes. We had an OK time. I like to be out and have a few beers and just relax, but I wish we could talk about something other than geology and the goings on of the geology department. It's to be expected, of course, but I get bored.

This morning I got up about 9:30, whined until John got out of bed and made some coffee (he was already awake, had to go to the office, so I wasn't being mean), had some cereal with John, and then I started cooking. I cut up a three pound chuck roast and threw it in the crock pot with some water, beef bullion, and onion slices. That's been in for three hours now, so we're getting there. I also fried up some chicken breast in small pieces for our pitas. John and I are both trying to eat better this semester. Last semester I was eating all kinds of bullshit all the time- pizza, burger after burger... that's fine in moderation, but I just got overwhelmed with scheduling, and honestly just some emotional stuff too that left me too tired to care about cooking. I really do like to cook, surprisingly, and by cooking at home we save money and get better nutrition. I intend to be overall less strung out and helpless with myself this semester.

I watched "Wife Swap" while eating a pita and having some V8, had some chai, and played piano. No one's here, so I sang loudly. I love to sing... the vibration in my chest and the noise escaping the body has always been so calming and connecting for me.

I think I'm going to head to the Rec now for a swim. I was going to go to the Rec with John later, but Joe's joining us for dinner after he gets done teaching at 5:30, so the timing won't work out. John won't care anyway, so he can just go do his thing and I can do mine. He's been doing really well with his exercise- four days in a row now. I'm proud of him. It is important to make that commitment to your own health.

It's not even all about longevity. It makes every day better. If I had to wake up and be sick every day, I'd rather just not wake up. I'm under no delusions of immortality or perfect health if I exercise and eat right, but I do know that it contributes to better energy levels and feelings of wellness every single day. And since every day counts in my book, that's worth it in and of itself.