dead bat

Wednesday, December 29, 2010
10:30PM

OK. I've reached that point where I'm ready to go back to Morgantown now. I love my family, and I have truly enjoyed my time here but I'm ready to be able to curl up with John again. I hate that it has to be this way, at our age, at this stage in our relationship, and we both care enough about our relationships with our families that we put our own aside for a week over the holidays. It's really sort of nonsensical, and it's starting to get to me. I want to talk to someone as I fall asleep again, or more likely, insist that he talk to me until I trail off to sleep. My bed here is really starting to hurt me, so I have a futon mattress laid out on the floor here in the family room now. I'm so tired from last night, and everyone is hanging out in here talking. I want to get a shower after a day of shopping and playing with animals, but Mom needs one and she is taking her time getting in there. I love them. I'm trying to chill out and enjoy this, and to this point in the break, I've been fairly successful with just letting it be what it is. Now I want to go back to the trailer, have someone to cuddle with at night, and not have it be an issue with anyone where my belongings are or what time I take my shower. I'm so hoping that my parents will let me sleep in the morning. This is the family room, so they feel this right to come in here and watch tv in the morning. I get that, but there's a tv in the living room too, and I'll only be here a couple more days. I just want to be able to sleep in a way that I don't have to pop ibuprofen first thing in the morning. I want to be greeted in the morning who someone who is glad to have me in their space, where I don't feel in the way and annoying.

We went to Parkersburg today. Bought a bathing suit for New Year's, and then we visited Jody. Well, I'd write more but battery is dying, don't want to lose what I have.